Are You Punishing Yourself? | Deco | Weekly Tarot Reading | 12/3 - 12/9 - Cosmic Updates

Are You Punishing Yourself? | Deco | Weekly Tarot Reading | 12/3 – 12/9

Have things just not been going your way lately?

Deco says things might not turn out the way you wanted this week, but if you invest some attention and care on yourself, it could turn things around.

She’s here to help you find the silver lining in your situation so you can turn your luck around.

P.S. Do you need a break from a disappointing situation? Could you deserve more credit than you’ve been giving yourself? Leave a comment and let Deco know!


Hello, my friends at Cosmic Updates. It is Deco back again with a weekly reading this time for the week of December 3rd through December 9th. I can’t believe that we are in December. I know we were in it last week too, but it just feels crazy how quickly this year has gone. It’s almost 2024 and all about fresh starts, new beginnings, but there’s always new beginnings throughout the year. So let’s think of how we can show up our best this week, what kind of things we might need to tackle. There’s always something to overcome, always something to tackle. So let’s see what we need to be focused on this week and how we can really show up best for ourselves and for the people around us, alright? All right, one more little shuffle. Here we go. 

Okay, alright my friends, so let’s start with the present, then we’ll move through whatever makes sense. Okay, so our challenge is the Nine of Pentacles. So the Nine of Pentacles is something that we’re kind of entitled to. The Nine of Pentacles is when we start spoiling ourselves a little bit after working so hard. But when it’s in the challenge position, it’s like you don’t feel like you’ve earned that or you don’t feel like you’ve gained enough in order to really invest in yourself and to take not risks necessarily, but to just honor the work that you’ve done and to give yourself back some of the things that you’ve gained. I think that it’s worth it to invest in ourselves sometimes, especially after we’ve been giving so much. But I think that that’s a struggle right now. 

And I think part of it with the heart of the matter being the Five of Wands in reverse is I feel like you’re feeling a little burnt out. You’ve been putting in so much effort, you’ve been working so hard towards so many goals and you’re tired. You want to give yourself a break, and that isn’t necessarily investing in yourself. Yes, self-care is important. Yes, taking time off is important, but feeling like you’ve given so much that now you don’t have any more to give. And so clearly, if you don’t have any more to give, you don’t deserve a break is a silly way of looking at things. We deserve these breaks. We put in this effort into our life, into our people, into all of these things. And for whatever reason, you’re struggling to give yourself the opportunities that you need to feel full right now. 

Past is the Nine of Cups in reverse, which is telling me maybe you’re a little disappointed at the chapter that you’re in. Yes, you’ve earned this opportunity to invest in yourself, but I think that you’re maybe, disappointed a little bit in where you are. Maybe it wasn’t exactly what you thought it was going to be. The Nine of Cups, when it’s upright, I’m like, dreams coming, true wishes granted, the things that you wanted are happening. But, when it’s in reverse, it’s like maybe your vision was a little bit clouded and what you thought was what you wanted was not really what you wanted. And, so there’s a little bit of discontent there where you’re like, I didn’t get what I thought I was going to get. So I definitely don’t deserve to invest in myself because this wasn’t the dream, this wasn’t the outcome I wanted. But, just because it wasn’t the outcome you wanted or expected doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve a little bit of positivity coming in and a little bit of investment going toward you. And maybe you’re even getting a little bit comparative. You’re like, “You know what? I invested myself in this way and it didn’t turn out the way it turned out for that person. I wanted what this person had, but I got this instead.” And, just because different doesn’t mean it’s not equal, doesn’t mean you don’t deserve the same things that other person gets, right? And so maybe this is the time to kind of rewrite those things in your brain. 

Okay. What’s interesting is this Three of Cups in reverse in the future, and I’m leaning toward a lot of times when the Three of Cups pops up, it’s like there are issues in your relationship, but in this placement, it makes me feel like you’re just going to retreat a little bit if you allow yourself to struggle to invest in yourself, to struggle to do things for yourself because you can’t pour from an empty cup. So instead of trying to invest in these people in your life, instead you’re like, “You know what? I’m just going to hole up and focus on myself and not go out with anybody. I don’t want them to see what I’m struggling with. I don’t want them to see what I’ve been going through and what I haven’t been excited about, even though it’s going really great.” Everybody else can think you’re doing a great job, but if you don’t feel that way, then it isn’t true. It’s all about perception. And if you perceive that you don’t earn these things or don’t deserve these things, then you’re going to have a hard time investing. 

Now your unconscious is the Four of Cups. So that whole not opening up thing makes sense. The Four of Cups, I call it the brat card. One of my friends has a deck. They say, this is the card where you’re acting like a brat where you’re not opening up, you’re like, everything’s fine but, really maybe you’re going through some things and instead of letting those things be known, you’re kind of making yourself miss out by not addressing those things, not bringing those things to the surface and talking about them. And I don’t think that this is something that you’re consciously thinking about. I think that this is something that’s just a natural reaction to a little bit of disappointment in yourself. And I think that it could lead, right? It isn’t going to lead, it could lead to these relationships being not stagnant, but just you kind of pulling away from those relationships. And that could lead to so many other things. 

Right now, we’ve also got the Ten of Swords in the conscious, and the Ten of Swords in the conscious is telling me that you’re like, you’re so done with whatever ended here, whatever dream you had for yourself, you feel like it’s over. You feel like that is over and done for. And maybe that’s part of this. It’s like you’ve reached a goal, you’ve had the resources being given to you, you could invest in yourself, but instead of doing that because it wasn’t what you were expecting, you’re like, “And I’m done. I’m not going to do that anymore. I’m going to try something different.” And, if that’s what you want to do, then so be it. But just remember that you still deserve this goodness in your life. You deserve to invest in yourself and to deprive yourself of that I don’t think is fair. 

Now, we’ve also got the Eight of Wands in reverse in the querent, which is telling me that you’re struggling to know what your goals are. You don’t have a laser focus. You don’t know where you want to be. So how would you focus on the steps to getting there? You’re a little bit clouded. You’re like, there’s too many options. There’s too many ways I could go. And the Eight of Wands, when it’s in reverse means you’re struggling to know where you want to focus your energy and your time and your passions. 

Now I see here why you might be feeling like you’re not wanting to invest, and it’s this King of Pentacles in reverse in the environment. So the environment being a personality, when I see a court card, I look at it as a personality that you’re interacting with. So the Kng of Pentacles being in reverse in your environment is suggesting that you feel a lack, you feel impoverished in some way. And when I say impoverished, I’m not meaning that you’re broke because that isn’t necessarily what this means. It could mean that you’re low on funds, but it also could mean you’re low on energy, you’re low on health. Maybe you’re just feeling unhealthy. Maybe you’re feeling like your family is not supporting you, or everything is kind of out of your hands and crazy right now as far as the things that you would normally have really firm control over. And I think that that’s part of it is that you’re struggling to know that you deserve more because you feel like you have less, you feel like you don’t deserve that energy because it needs to go somewhere else. But man, I feel like this is a big mental thing that you need to overcome and understand that opening up and talking about these things and processing these things is really a beneficial way to move forward.

Okay, we’ve got the Page of Swords in reverse, in your hopes and fears. And I think this is more a fear than a hope. It could be a hope. It’s really a struggle to open up. It’s a struggle to communicate and be logical about your thought processes. Maybe you’re letting your emotions kind of get in the way of being able to see things clearly and to address things upfront instead of letting them kind of build and have you end up exploding over something small. But that fear is like you just have to overcome it. It’s so important to talk through the things that you’re struggling with and to communicate those things with people so that you can process those things in a way that makes sense for you instead of just holing up and acting like everything’s okay by yourself, when really things are not okay. 

Now, Six of Swords, or not Six of Swords, sorry, Six of Wands is in reverse in our outcome. And man, it’s like, again, I feel like this Three of Cups in reverse and this Six of Wands in reverse are totally, they are in your control of whether they come to fruition or not, right? There is nothing in here that says you will go off by yourself and lose all of your friends. This is saying you’re struggling through something and there’s a chance that you will isolate and not get the attention from friends that you need in order to feel supported by them. They won’t call you out. They won’t give you the positives that you need. Maybe because you shut them down, maybe because you don’t even give them the opportunity to talk to you in the first place. And so instead of feeling like you’re making progress, you feel like you’re out on your own kind of trying to figure your way out by yourself, which is not, again, it’s not healthy. It’s not healthy for us to isolate. It’s not healthy for us to push people away. We’re pack animals. We do better in groups, whether you’re an introvert or not. We all have our people. So I don’t know if you’re going through this and you really feel like the things that you’ve been working for didn’t work out in the way that you wanted them to my friends, it doesn’t mean that you’re not capable. It doesn’t mean that you’re not deserving. It just means that you need to look at things in a different way and give yourself credit for the things that you did accomplish, even if they weren’t exactly what you expected them to be. Don’t push away people for fear of judgment or for fear of embarrassment. People not realizing that you’re going through a hard time, right? It’s like you can be authentic with those people, and that is when they will come out of the woodwork to support you. So be real. Don’t push those people away. They want to be in your life. They want to support you and praise you, but if you try your hardest to push them away, it could work. So be careful, be thoughtful. Think about those things that you are ignoring, those successes that you aren’t looking at as successes. Retrain your brain to recognize when you’ve made an accomplishment, even if it’s not what you thought it was going to be. Okay? All right. Best of luck this week and I’ll see you next time. Bye.

Deco Lo
Deco Lo

Deco is an intuitive tarot reader whose mission is to give guidance to those who need it. She has a passion for making connections with those she reads for and loves to teach others about tarot. Deco loves learning and is always looking to deepen her understanding of the tarot and its spiritual connections.

  • Avatar
    Posted at 22:33h, 05 December Reply

    Wow this was so on point I mean every exact word you’re saying it’s like you explained things I couldn’t even put into words nor make sense at the moment !!! Incredible 🧘🏻‍♀️….

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    Roxana Reeves
    Posted at 06:36h, 05 December Reply

    Beautiful Deco, Always right on. Thank you for the reading.

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    Georgia Ann Johnson
    Posted at 02:22h, 04 December Reply

    Deco, this week’s reading expresses exactly what is on my mind, and the situation I find myself in is also reflected. My entire life has consisted of giving to others with no expectations. I am the oldest of 13 children whose parents each had a partner who had passed away very young. I have spent all my life since I was 13 years old without my mother who died in childbirth. Interestingly, I have never been given anything by anyone in return for the love and care I truly and happily gave to others. I didn’t initially “give to get”, but after an entire lifetime, it is scary to watch others be included unconditionally in gifts, plans, and accolades both earthly and spiritual, by friends, family, and close romantic committed relationships. It appears that I am missing something in my nature essential to being participant in these experiences. My only solution is to truly believe that we are on this earth as a test for another journey ahead of us.

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    Sal Lovato
    Posted at 23:14h, 03 December Reply

    It’s been hard I am losing my friends cause they only think of themselves . They do bad stuff drugs and I’m not that kind of person I have grown up and they only want me to give them advice and tell m their drama and when I try to talk to them they don’t listen they act like they care but they don’t so I don’t have friends at this time and I lost my dog the day after thanksgiving and I didn’t have a thanksgiving I was worried of my dog and took her to the vet and they didn’t do anything for her . And I am starting to hurt my legs are in so much pain a burning of some sort and I can’t stand that. Much and I haven’t felt special or loved in a long time . My sisters don’t call me when I call them and I leave messages but I’m really felling like everything I worked for has just blown up since before 2021 and I have lost hope and my dream was d o a on trying to save it because clients treated me so bad no respect and very wanting every time I worked so hard to make them happy and including a discount and all I got was no respect and lots of insecurity and lies from them and I didn’t do anything but try as hard as I could and my friends never called me when my sisters died and they knew and my dad or my brother no even the people I worked with ever gave me a card or said I m sorry for your sisters or dad or brother. It’s so sad that life has really played a heart ful job on me and I right now feel like nothing of value to give any credit where credit is due even though I haven’t taken a vacation in 10 + years and I struggled and never said a word to no one , why this world isn’t like me or thinks like me . I have a heart and empathy and if u need anything I’m their and not one has yet to do that for me ever.

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      Lashonda Graham
      Posted at 00:10h, 04 December Reply

      You nailed it

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    Marlene phillips
    Posted at 20:37h, 03 December Reply

    You and the cards were spot on but you gave some good advice I will take your advice and move on to better days. Thank you

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    Lawrence F. Kissell
    Posted at 19:46h, 03 December Reply

    Thank you Deco, it’s been a very informative reading! I look forward to next week’s reading. I’m gonna work on what you’ve said.

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    Lindsay Game
    Posted at 19:36h, 03 December Reply

    First time watching your video. I felt like you were talking directly to me. Exactly what I needed to hear. Right Place Right Time. Love and Light

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    Posted at 10:54h, 03 December Reply

    Seem no light and lack of support from above
    Insist for so long and give so much
    No recognition
    Don’t know where my destination

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    Shirley wilson
    Posted at 10:44h, 03 December Reply

    I found this reading to be Right On fir me at this time! Thank you for pointing out errors in thinking & possible better actions.

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    Claudia Barillas
    Posted at 09:55h, 03 December Reply

    Thank You for your mesage. At some point I will find the light that will strengthen me to move forward.

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    Sue D
    Posted at 09:29h, 03 December Reply

    Thank you that’s me all over! Spot on

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    Posted at 09:03h, 03 December Reply

    Dead ON. Thank you.

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    Diane Thielman
    Posted at 07:04h, 03 December Reply

    You are spot on, I look forward to your reading every week

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    Shanika smith
    Posted at 06:25h, 03 December Reply

    This was on time.I had a heart break yesterday.I relocated and My friend back home said he gonna move on and mat someone.right after telling me he loves me.He feel he wont beable to see his kids so he aint travelling out here and I left like her.

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